About

MAKING TIME AND SPACE FOR ONESELF

 

Making time and space for myself felt like an impossible dream for most of my life. 

 

I always believed I wasn’t good enough, lacked the proper training, or simply didn’t deserve it. 

Between working from a young age, raising a family, and managing a home, there never seemed to be a moment to breathe, let alone express my creativity. 

 

I was told that art was a luxury, something for the rich or privileged. 

More than once, I heard that the only artists who mattered were those who became valuable after their deaths. 

I was taught that creating art was an indulgence, a distraction meant for those who had no real responsibilities. 

Growing up Catholic, in a society based on capitalism and competition, I was surrounded by the idea that anything worthwhile should serve others or lead to financial success. 

Self-expression was deemed selfish, as if wanting to create was a betrayal of my duties. This conditioning drove me to serve everyone else but myself. 

 

I wanted so desperately to fit in and be accepted by my “tribe” that I drained myself, both emotionally and physically. I believed happiness meant making everyone else happy.

 

But at some point, in my fifties, I came to a shocking realization: I HAD ABANDONED MYSELF!

 

I never chose myself, never allowed myself the right to be whole. 

 

And the consequences of this were immense—my 40-year marriage unraveled, my relationships strained, and my connection to my children became distant. 

 

I was left alone, grappling with the pieces of a life I thought I had built for others, but never for myself.

 

It was during this difficult period that I experienced a revolutionary awakening. 

I understood that happiness does not come from constant self-sacrifice but from making the conscious choice to nurture ourselves. 

Giving to others without filling our own cup first leaves us resentful, exhausted, and creatively depleted. We cannot give genuinely from an empty vessel.

 

My greatest revelation and regret was realizing that my so-called "giving" had become toxic. 

The stress and resentment in my actions had seeped into everything, harming those I loved most. 

I had to break the cycle and repair my “choosing muscle.” I was chasing connection out of fear, not generosity of spirit.

 

In choosing myself, I discovered that creating time and space for self-nurturing was the key to living fully. 

It’s not selfish to ask for this from our families or partners. 

In fact, it takes immense courage to set these boundaries. But doing so is crucial for our well-being and the well-being of those we care about. 

 

If we consistently protect a sacred space and dedicate time to ourselves, we create the mental and spiritual environment for inspiration to emerge.

 

I believe it’s essential to create a practice of being in that space—whether it’s a room, a corner, or even just a small table that is uniquely ours. 

Let it be filled with things that inspire beauty in you: music, textures, colors, flowers, quotes, sacred objects. 

Go to this space daily, even if only to sit quietly and honor that time. 

MAKE SURE EVERYONE KNOWS NOT TO DISTURB YOU.

Eventually, the ideas and inspiration will come.

 

The beauty of choosing oneself is that, paradoxically, we find we have so much more to give! 

The giving becomes genuine and healthy. 

 

The world will adjust for you because time and space are infinite, and there is always room for you to exist fully. 

 

Take up space in your life—claim it boldly. 

It is your birthright to create, to breathe, and to fill yourself with love, so that you may share it abundantly without ever depleting your soul.