BEING COMFORTABLE WITH DISCOMFORT
There are two ways of looking at this dynamic.
Most people take this to mean pushing one’s boundaries and tolerance for uncomfortable, new situations.
When reaching for one’s desires, it is necessary to stay with the uncomfortable feeling of a new experience. If we have not experienced something, even if it is for our own edification, the unknown is scary.
We are prone to ask ourselves questions like: If I do this new thing, what will happen if I fail? Am I qualified enough to do this? What will people think?
This is normal and part of an evolutionary process.
So, the process of becoming comfortable with discomfort is a positive one. It brings change and new perspectives and possibilities.
However, the flipside of this is when trauma sets us up for stagnation. Meaning, when people have experienced trauma and survived it without resolving it, being uncomfortable is the norm. Trauma disregards boundaries, and someone experiencing it long term without healthy processing of it, requires an ability to accommodate discomfort.
Discomfort, then, becomes the norm. In this situation, there is no true change, and the person is stuck in the story of the trauma. There is no evolution, no creative action taking.
It is not uncommon for trauma victims to endure situations that most people would see as abusive and difficult. Unresolved trauma grooms one for inaction and self-preservation. Extreme situations of abuse like kidnaping, and or domestic abuse, when prolonged, rob the victim of choices for autonomous action because the preservation of life takes on paramount importance.
So, the person becomes desensitized, and develops tolerance, to the uncomfortable situation so as to stay alive.
So, how to distinguish between the two perspectives?
For me, for I can only speak of my experience, I can tell when being uncomfortable is a good experience or a bad one.
If the uncomfortable situation feels like something familiar, and prevents me from taking changing action, it is a trauma experience.
If the uncomfortable feeling also makes my heart race because it is connected wit a strong desire, it is a moment of change, and the only way to relieve the discomfort is to act decisively. Such experiences bring us out of trauma and story and propel us into evolution and transformation.
So, being comfortable with discomfort has two meanings and understanding the difference is key to moving forward in our quest for a loving, fulfilling life.
Ask yourself, when pushing against discomfort, if there is only fear of or if there is a strong desire behind the fear.
🌟 Embracing Discomfort: A Journey of Growth 🌟
There’s power in getting comfortable with discomfort. 💪 But let’s dive deeper into what that really means.
🔄 Two Perspectives: On one hand, it's about expanding our horizons, pushing boundaries, and embracing new experiences, even if they make us uneasy. 🚀 This discomfort is a sign of growth and evolution.
🛑 On the flip side, unresolved trauma can trap us in a cycle where discomfort becomes the norm. 😔 It's not about growth, but survival.
🔍 Distinguishing the Two: How do we tell the difference? It's all about the feeling behind the discomfort. 🤔
🚦 Trauma Discomfort: If it feels familiar and stifles change, it might be trauma speaking. 🚫
💓 Growth Discomfort: But if it’s fueled by a strong desire, even if it makes your heart race, that’s where transformation lies. 🌱
So, next time you're faced with discomfort, ask yourself: Is it fear holding me back, or is there a deeper desire waiting to be pursued?
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